Gaping is a positively fascinating occurrence in the adult film world (and presumably at home with more adventurous lovers) where the girl- or maybe the guy, who knows- will grab their posterior and spread it open, and grab further in until the actual entrance of the anus is being grabbed and stretched apart, creating a gaping hole. One of the most famous Internet memes of all time is based on this concept, yet doesn’t help answer the question “Why is gaping a thing?” It’s mostly just for the other person to look at. Why would you want to look closely at someone’s gaping asshole? I don’t know. I’m not sure if the people doing it know either, but I’ve stopped asking questions like that. In the porn star world, gaping is quite common… but less common is that they look exactly like famous celebrities. We review a list of 20 famous celebrities who have porn star lookalikes, and it’s shockingly accurate. If you’ve ever wanted to watch a celebrity into gaping, this is probably as close as you’ll get.
Speaking of gaping, many people would say there’s a gaping vulnerability in our country letting Ebola in and spreading its wings of death across our land. We wouldn’t say that, because we’re rational and know that you can’t catch Ebola unless you come in contact with people’s bodily fluids, but other less rational people like John Hagee is quite certain that Ebola is a judgment from god for our sins. Probably all the gaping. His argument lacks one key ingredient of a debate; “making sense” but why should that stop a public figure from continuing to stupefy the public with their idiocy?
Ben talks about his new iPhone Magnum, and how he became sad giving up his old phone because he develops irrational attachment to inanimate objects because they’re “loyal.” Loyalty in this simply being the fact that they don’t leave him like everyone else does, which is a pretty pathetic qualifier… but then again, Ben is a pretty pathetic person.
In a news story that surprised everyone, John Grisham came out defending pedophiles, sort of. Not real pedophiles, but ones who “drunkenly stumble into child porn sort of by accident.” While that’s definitely the argument Ben will use at his inevitable court hearing, the general consensus seems to be that this happen approximately never. John might be just a wee bit out of touch. Shocking, considering his existence is based on licensing his name to other people to write books while he sits back collecting money. How could someone like that not have their finger on the pulse of society?